So much to happen in one weekend

We had a god day yesterday, went and saw Over the Hedge :) The kids loved it and I must admit so did I! Great film.
Before that I was doing the housework - lots to do and already it looks like nothing was done - why is this family such dirt magnets. When we got back from the film we had a BBQ which was nice. I was a little bugged that I missed all the fun with the pool though - stuck in the house with the food while everyone else managed to play around - think I am a little jealous!

Alice was at my parents last night and so Gaw and I had the evening to ourselves but because of the heat by the time we finally got round to it we only got to have one drink at the pub. And with that drink we had a row - seems to be quite a common thing now. I am fairly certain there is animosity coming from both of us and we just seem to have to find a reason to have a go. He feels I don't understand him nor do I offer any understanding for him or anything he is going through and I feel he is quite selfish.

Marriage came up and Gaw said that he didn't think it was a big commitment and it would mean more if we brought a house together. I feel that I want marriage not to trap him or for the party but because I want to be joined to him. I would get married in a small ceremony or a big one I just want us to share this and I feel he doesn't see it like that. As far as he is concerned he has been burnt once and he won't be putting himself out there again so that I can stomp on him and his feelings. Am I being unreasonable? Is my desire to have another child putting him on edge? Why s nothing ever simple??

I always believed that when you met the right person it all just fell into place and you took all the logical steps. Guess I was wrong. I love him but I just can't stop rowing with him. I have to be understanding but he can stomp on my dreams because they don't suit him right now. What are we doing??

Ever since his break-down he has been someone totally different and he thinks that it is just me, not understanding. Oh man I wish I had the answers, lets see how this afternoon goes - BBQ at my sisters.